Dear Retired Madame

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Dear Retired Madame,

 

 I’m so glad that you decided to shop at my store. I’ve waited 22 years of my life yearning to be bossed around by your grumpy ass. Why no, I won’t mind dropping everything I’m doing to help you price check and item. No, I am not lifting this heavy fixture, please… take your time shopping,. You make life grand. Please…Interrupt my line of people to bitch at me because I won’t hurry to your side and ignore the transaction I’m in the middle of. Your mother would be proud of your manners. She brought up a nice young lady that grew up to be a miserable ol’ maid with a poorly done dye job and a crappy attitude.

Please, throw your clothing all over my clean counter and act like a total a-hole at the check out. Why yes… I do like hangers in my face.

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