From Dream to Reality

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Dear Creeps,

Don’t ever deny yourself a chance to make your dreams a reality. Don’t be scared of the unknown and hop out of your comfort zone. You’ll feel so much better and see more opportunities in front of you. I was such a meek girl when I was younger. I ignored a lot of chances to get moving forward because I went by word of mouth or I didn’t have the drive for success. Then, just recently – a GIGANTIC weight was put on my shoulders. I had no choice but to step forward and branch out of my meek exterior. Inside, I was a burning flame. I had so much potential and so many dreams. Here I am. Accomplishing it all. By shattering my meek shell and deciding to be me for once.

I’ve had an interesting year. 2013 was the ending of many things… but the creation of something even better. My love and I have a passion for music and the industry. We have a heart for independent musicians since we are ones ourselves. Not only are we helping my family’s ice cream shop and well-being, we’re creating a place for independent acts to achieve their dream of being exposed and either creating or helping a fan base grow. This music festival fundraiser has reached all the way down to central New York! I really enjoy being surrounded by the hustle and bustle of creating this thing! Bands, Music, Stages, Lights… this is all I’ve ever wanted to do in my life. We are BOTH exhausted and look forward to the festival’s arrival and to relax with a bonfire afterwards. Unsuccessful Entertainment will be back making videos AFTER the festival!

Can't ya tell we're exhausted?  © Mercy Desdemona 2013

Can’t ya tell we’re exhausted?
© Mercy Desdemona 2013

 

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Life

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Life

Here we are. Mercy and Will. Outside doing our WBC pickets Jeff Hanneman video. It was nice to be out and about. But I tend to frown with the sun. It hurts my skin pretty bad being so fair skinned.

You Just Know…

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So many of us spend too much time wondering what if and doubting the lovely world around us. When something is going great – we tend to look at what could happen instead of the beautiful reality before us. Many people say I’m too young to know my emotions fully and that “living in sin” with my boyfriend is an entirely bad idea. I always get asked: How do you know you want to be with him long term? The thing is, you just know. When you have an argument, you can’t walk away because you’re so worried if the other one is okay. You support them in their time of need, even when times are dark. You become a team of one, instead of two individuals lost within the world. Your souls intertwine at a spiritual level. I may be a young lady. I have much of this world ahead of me. But, I am confident in saying that I know he will always be there. Through the amazing and through the horrid. It’s a feeling within my gut, heart, and soul. It’s an unexplainable connection, which is why it’s so hard to answer the question. It’s one of those things people have to experience first hand!

Don’t be Afraid! Stop What Iff-ing and start living!

Myself and my love.

Myself and my love.

 

We met awhile back and started discussing music, dreams, films, etc. and noticed we had a lot in common. It wasn’t before long, we went from friends to lovers. Even as friends, we could both sense there was something more to the relationship. When angry, we never fail to bring a smile upon our faces. When things are horrid, we keep each other afloat against the waves of the sea of depression. I never thought I could meet someone so dear to me. Feel so much emotion and feel so alive!

After living hours away from each other, we decided to move in together. It was the best thing we could do for our lovely relationship. Why? Because it made us stronger. We no longer had to feel depressed when the other was gone away due to technological difficulties and such.

Our connection is deep and unique. We can feel each others emotions. We instantly know when something is wrong. We walk the same path. Faithfulness and Loyalty is still out there in the sea of the unfaithful. I found my love and you can find yours.

 

 

 

Living in Sin

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Hello Creeps. I’m going to take a moment out to discuss why I think people saying “Living in Sin” are full of crap.

My boyfriend and I live together. We aren’t married and we aren’t engaged. We are boyfriend and girlfriend – a serious relationship. Sure, we’re in our early twenties and people see us as too young to know what serious is. But, that isn’t the case. We talk to each other when there is something wrong – like adults would. We don’t just blow up at each other and act like kids. Secondly, we help each other and my family. We contribute to the household and work on obtaining our dream career.

We get crap from religious relatives telling us that we are living in sin. We get watched by them when they are visiting too. Because they think we’re going around trying to get pregnant and be a sinner in our life. We both aren’t religious people. It’s not a sin to live with the person you love. In fact, living together is helping our relationship more than hurting it.

It’s helping us know each other from the inside out. We’re like best friends and boyfriend and girlfriend. There’s nothing wrong with that. The term living in sin is retarded. I personally, don’t think anyone should get married before they are 40. I say this because that is when you are old enough to make that decision. So many people just get married because of a child on the way, to make others happy, or because they are told it’s the “right thing to do”. That’s NOT what marriage should be about. It’s about the affection between two individuals that choose to get married because THEY want too. Not because they are tired of the backlash of “living in sin” people. Because they truly want to combine.

I honestly think marriage isn’t a necessity. If anything, it makes people into actors and actresses. Because they think okay, we’re married life is changing. It’s not different than being faithful to your boyfriend or girlfriend. But because of people’s ideals pushed in our brains we end up becoming the stereotypes (i.e. woman bitches about socks on the floor; man lays on couch and chugs beer.) When in reality, it doesn’t need to be like that. Stop becoming the stereotype. Just because you get married doesn’t mean you have to change who you are. And living in sin doesn’t mean you are going to hell. It means you are being a smart individual. Learning your lover. Working hard at the relationship. It means that you are taking a mature step in your life. You’ve thought out the pros and cons. And are willing to accept the ups and downs. It’s no different than marriage except the fact that you don’t have family members trying to dictate your life becuase they just see your relationship as disposable.

“Living in Sin” doesn’t make you an irresponsible child. Getting married for other people’s reasons and playing house makes you an irresponsible child.

– Mercy Desdemona

The Girl – Intro

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**** This is a story I wrote in 9th grade (I’m guessing) for a school horror project. Needless to say the post here, I’ve re-written to make it more how I write now. The original intro will be written below the Re-Written.*****

It’s 5:08 AM. I’m still awake from the night before. The house is silent as it creaks with the wind. My mother lay asleep next to my father in the next room. Their snores seem to echo throughout the silent house. I’m lying upon my bed, bathed in light from the sky. I don’t know what has come over me lately. I just never sleep. I got out of my bed quietly, tiptoeing downstairs. No lights are on and I smile in the dark. I love the dark and the way it holds me. The way the devil’s arms seem to be around me. Much like that of the embrace of a lover.
I made my way to our neat and tidy living room. Everything had its place. Ever since mom became best friends with Prozac. I went over to the family portrait. As I’m standing there looking at our faces with the phony smile and the “everything is well” pose… I wished it would burn. Burn to hell. Burn it all! I hate having a fake smile. I hate the way I cannot be true to who I am within. No one would understand what’s within. No one… not even myself.
I try to hold back tears as I stood there. Oh, what I would do to have my friend back. If he wouldn’t have died, maybe my mind wouldn’t be in this state. He taught me how to be strong in a family full of liars. A family full of lunatics that would tear each other down instead of help them up. I throw the portrait into the fireplace and watched it burn slowly. A grin came upon my face as I watched the flame devour our faces. First, my father’s face, then my mothers and finally mine. I felt a sense of evil running through my veins. It was like a drug and I was the addict. No rehab for me. I slowly walked into the kitchen and grabbed a knife. I slowly made my way up the stairs, being ever so quiet, and slowly opened my parent’s bedroom door…

© Mercy Desdemona 2012

Original Written in ’06:

It’s 5:08AM. I’m still awake from the night before. My mother lay asleep next to my father in the next room. There snores seem to echo through the house. I tiptoe downstairs. No lights are on. I love the dark. The way it holds me. The way the devil’s arms seem to be around me. A loving embrace.
I go towards the living room. Looking at my family portrait. I wish it would burn. Burn to hell. Burn it all! I hate my fake smile. I hate the way I can’t be myself. No one understands. No one!! Not even me!! Oh. What I would do to have my friend back. If he wouldn’t have died, maybe my mind wouldnt be in this state. He taught me how to be strong in a family full of liars. A family full of close-minded lunatics.
I throw the portrait in the fire. Grin as I watch our faces burn. BURN BABY!! first my father’s face, then my mothers. Finally mine. I felt the evilness goes through my veins. It was like drug. I was addicted. No rehab for me. I slowly walked into the kitchen. Grabbed a knife. Started making my way up the stairs. I slowly opened my parent’s bedroom door….

© Mercy Desdemona 2006

The Lodger – A Story of the London Fog (1927)

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Hello Creeps. I apologize that my Friday Night horror film review is taking place on this Saturday morning. I completely lost track of the days. Today I would like to discuss one of my personal Hitchcock favorites: The Lodger – A Story of the London Fog. This film is one of his silent films from 1927, and is one of the few that didn’t end up lost. Let’s sum up the story line: News has spread that there is a killer on the loose who is killing women with blonde hair. A man asks for a room at what I assume is an inn or apartment building. The mother of the daughter begins to question if the man is in fact the serial killer.

The film starts out with a police men talking to a distressed woman. They find a piece of paper with the words “The Avenger” on it. I felt this opening made you feel like you were part of the movie. We find out that the Avenger is a Tall man with his face wrapped up. That is the only description that could be made about the serial killer The Avenger. He favored to kill women with beauty and golden hair. It’s quite apparent that The Avenger is like a Jack the Ripper who favored to mutilate prostitutes.
What I enjoy most about this film is the fact that it feels like you are part of it. It feels like you are someone walking down the street listening to the paper boy scream about the recent news. It feels like you’re in the car with the police officers driving through the streets. It feels like you are at the apartment building living with the family and worrying about who could be next.
This film mixes horror, comedy, and romance all into one in a great manner. For example, the daughter of the landlady is a fashion model with golden hair. To keep safe from The Avenger she wears a hat the covers the rest of her hair but has dark curls at the front end to make it look like she’s a dark haired woman.
When we get to the apartment building, we meet the mother, father, and the lover of the daughter. The lover of the daughter is a detective who goes on the search for The Avenger within the film. When the lodger comes to ask for a room, he immediately begins to stare at the daughter. At first, you start to believe that he finds her to be a very beautiful woman and she has captured his interest.
The daughter and the lodger become good friends and she doesn’t think it will cause any harm done by being friends. Her family and her lover don’t approve of the friendship since the Lodger is nothing but a mere stranger.
I enjoy the fact that this film can mix your emotions towards everyone in the film. There isn’t a moment where you aren’t actually thinking about each character in the film. Since it’s silent, the actors and actresses portray the emotion very well. It comes out of the screen and into your body to flow within. Unlike many silent films of the time, the body language of the people in the film isn’t over acted. Their reactions are more realistic as to what the reactions would be if we were all there in real life.

If you’d like to get lost within this Hitchcock film I found the full movie here:

If you do check out the film, please feel free to comment back and share with me your thoughts. I’d be interested in hearing them.

Blood & Guts,
Mercy Desdemona.

Don’t Put Your Nose There!

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Hello Creeps.

If you haven’t been able to tell by my recent posts, I’m missing my lover very much. You see, we haven’t been able to contact each other as much as we usually do thanks to the people that are trying to be petty. It’s a personal manner so I won’t get into it, but it’s sad that people think a little distance will harm our relationship. We’re a very strong and loving couple that will do anything to make our relationship strong.

Today, I had some outsider of the relationship come to try to cause a ruckus and mark him as a cheater. He and I have been dealing this for the past months we’ve been together because he and I keep our private life, private. We don’t air our private laundry out on social media or use it to get attention like many people our your age do. It’s nothing like that. We’re a serious couple that work together during the ups and downs.

People on the outside have gone as far as stalk our profiles and try to cause issues. Without knowing the full subject manner at hand, you attempt to create drama because you hate you don’t know. Well, guess what darlings… you’ll NEVER know. Because my love and I keep things between us where it belongs.

– Mercy Desdemona