Nude Hotel Man


It’s always odd my creeps to have situations in your life that make you end up saying “Did that really happen?” I thought I would share a traumatizing event with you creepers of the web. Back when I was a sophomore in high school, my good friend and I went on a road trip out of town and stayed at a Holiday Inn. As most teenage girls, we jumped around, caused a ruckus, and just flat out had a lot of fun.

While we were trying to watch some television, we heard a noise from outside. It sounded like children running wild down the hallway. But, when we looked out the peep hole, it was a very overweight man in a tuxedo waddling around the halls. Slightly creeped out that this man was pacing outside our room, we went back to doing our random things of the night.

Hungry began to rear it’s ugly head and we decided to order a pizza. She took up the responsibility of ordering the delicious dinner while I decided to go out and retrieve beverages from the vending machine. While at the machine, I could feel that someone was behind me. I turned around to see that heavy set gentleman practically nude rubbing his stomach and telling me that he needed some mountain dew. He was rather close to me and making me feel uncomfortable. Needless to say, I had a look of horror on my face… sort of like this:

A mouse like girl poked her head out of what I believe to this day was their room and started cheering on Mountain Dew.

I returned to the room with the beverages and my friend was laughing like a complete maniac at my facial expression (similar to the one pictured above incase you have forgotten) and said that my pale complexion got paler (if that’s possible, I do not know).

I have recovered from this event. Also, that was the night I was accused of sleeping next to a Twix Bar, two basketball players said I was the whitest white girl they’ve ever seen, and we scared the pizza man.

Ah, memories. I’m off to rethink my life choices and put a paper bag over my face.

Horrible wishes to you all from deep within my heart.

– Mercy Desdemona