Two feelings I have been feeling lately: Depression & Anxiety.
I haven’t been this down in the dumps for a long time, but after dealing with this big weight on my shoulders for sometime and still not knowing any answers, I’m getting quite irritated. I don’t have any form of security – even though I know funding is on it’s way. I just don’t feel secure. I feel like I’m just blowing around in the wind. I don’t look forward to waking up in the morning because it seems like it’s just the same ol’ shit. I can’t move forward with anything. No matter how much I try. I can’t take this pressure anymore. I’ve lost sight of myself.
I’m even starting to push the love of my life away during my time of depression. I just want to be me and just move forward with everything. I’ve grown tired of being stuck at where I’m at. I want a life’s purpose. With it being prime ice cream time right now, and the pressure on to get open and get the funding here as soon as possible, I don’t know what’s going to go on. I just want my funding to arrive so I can move forward not for just me, but my family, and my boyfriend.
This is something I worked hard for. I want to accomplish something for once that I set out to do. I’m tired of being told good ideas and them never coming through. I just want my funding to get here. I need some cash to work with. I’m tired of being drained of all my cash to go into a business that is a rich idea – but is at a stand still.
The anxious nature in my house – the stress – the insecurity.
I can’t take it anymore.